The Sukang Iloko Situation

I couldn't stop laughing at this blog entry by The Soshal Network.

Sobrang benta talaga sila sakin. But this particular kahibangan that Ms. Provinciated did at the airport hits very close to home. I was brought back to that incident when my then-housemate Jing and I were about to board our flight back to Manila from Laoag. It had something to do with sukang Iloko. 

Let me recount from the day we were flying to Laoag para alam niyo na may pinanggagalingan itong po-ot ko. 

So, it was our first and last trip as housemates before Jing moved to Singapore. The plan was just to lounge around the Pagudpud shore for about 2 days and do nothing else. Jing knew this quaint bedspace for 3 persons that we could rent for 2 nights (her friend Waway would follow on the 2nd day). Ang ikina-excite namin, was that the bedspace owner would cook breakfast for us, basta kami ang bibili ng lulutuin niya. So before d-day, todo grocery kami ng breakfast stuff (plus other snacks). Then we found out that Purefoods Corned Beef has a Chili Garlic variant and I swear it was the most exciting thing we've discovered together since Nusica (the cheaper version of Nutella).

So this just made us anticipate our breakfast-by-the-beach even more. Hyped na hyped na sa isip namin eh. Ramdam na ramdam na namin yung corned beef sa mga bibig namin with the sound of beach waves rolling behind us. 

D-day: We left for the airport in the morning, bringing our carry-on bags and the bag of groceries we bought the night before. Siyempre excited na kami, all we could think of was Pagudpud and yung breakfast namin na corned beef kinabukasan and the vigan longganisa breakfast on our last morning in Ilocos... 

Until our bags went under the x-ray scanner. Ate guard rummaged through my Robinsons Supermarket plastic bag and pulled out 2 corned beef cans. At dun na ako natauhan. Anakng#!@, we forgot that canned goods should be checked in! In our defense naman, natabunan kasi ng chichirya yung mga de lata, so it slipped our minds. Pero oo na, ang tanga. I tried talking my way out of it pa:

Me: Ate, wala po kasi kaming checked-in baggage

Ate: Bawal talaga ma'am.

Me: Pero ate, ito po sana pang breakfast namin bukas, wala kasi kaming mabibilhan dun.

Ate: Bawal talaga ma'am.

O SIGE NA ATE WAG NA. When we asked where we should leave the canned goods, Ate said doon nalang daw, siya na magtatabi. Kita mo nga naman, nakafree breakfast pa si Ate.

Pero it was water under the bridge. Mali naman namin. So okay na, nakamove on na kami... or so I thought.

Fast forward to our last day. We had time to go to the market and buy our favorite Ilocano food before our flight to Manila. We went to look for bagnet, Vigan longganisa, and sukang Iloko.  But as luck would have it, we were able to buy everything but sukang Iloko. You'd think we'd be able to find it anywhere in Ilocos kasi nga sukang "ILOKO" yung name diba? But surprisingly, not too many stalls sold it in the public market. Buti nalang, one manang led us further into the market alleys and toward the one (and only) stall that sells the suka, which were inside recycled Rufina patis bottles pa. Juice ko. Struggle. Anyway, I only bought one...selfish eh, for personal consumption lang. :)  

At the airport, we were smarter in packing everything including the food we just bought. I knew liquids weren't allowed on carry-on bags so we checked everything in, especially my sukang Iloko, because the corned beef incident CANNOT HAPPEN AGAIN. Confidently, we walked through the initial baggage check when suddenly, Ate guard pulled my precious sukang Iloko out of the bag. Oh no, you don't!

Ate: Ma'am bawal po ito.

Me: Ay ate, ichecheck-in po namin yan (with conviction).

Ate: Kahit check-in po, hindi pwede.

ANO DAW?! Paki-ulit?

Me: Diba sa carry-on baggage lang hindi pwede?

Ate: Hindi po ma'am pati check-in po

Jing: Suka naman yan ate. Sa ibang flights namin allowed naman.

Ate: Sa Cebu Pacific po, talaga, hindi po pwede

Me: So walang nagdadala ng suka galing dito papunta sa ibang lugar?

Ate: Sorry ma'am, sabi po sa amin bawal. Iiwan niyo nalang po dito.

Doon na nagdilim ang paningin ko. Okay lang yung once, but twice is too much. Nakarma na nga ata ako kasi para sa akin lang yung binili ko. Pero sumusobra na sila. Okay lang yung corned beef, pero kung pati yung suka ko na pinaghirapan kong hanapin kukunin din nila, hindi na makatarungan yon. Paano nalang ang mga longganisa namin??? Saan namin sila isasawsaw???

But as it seemed, Ate wasn't going to budge. PUWES, walang makikinabang ng suka ko. Ang hirap kaya hanapin tapos ganun-ganon lang? Mukha lang akong angelic pero hindi ako ganun ka-generous uy!

So I said "okay" in the calmest possible manner, took the sukang Iloko and walked at the end of the x-ray aisle behind Ate guard, opened the bottle, and poured all its contents in the garbage can...releasing that tingling sour smell. Que se joda kung mangasim ang mga nasa airport. 

In the middle of my dramatic act, Ate guard tried to control the situation by saying, "Ma'am, kahit itapon niyo nalang po ng diretso, huwag niyo nang buksan," to which I retorted, "Ay hindi, Ate. Para di na magamit," while continuing to empty the bottle. Kulang nalang evil laughter to complete the Senyora Santibañez peg.

We finally got to check in a few minutes after and were at the waiting gate, when what I did finally caught up with my conscience. Medyo tinablan din ako ng hiya. I told Jing it could be because of the pent up anger from our confiscated corned beef. Naipon yung frustration. Jing whispered, "Mars, kinabahan ako sayo. Akala ko hindi na tayo makakauwi ng Manila today ng dahil sa suka." She admitted that during the entire episode, she expected a number of guards to come and arrest me or something. LOL.

In fairness, nahiya nga ako. Pero tapos na eh, so pinanindigan ko nalang. It wasn't Ate guard's fault and she was only doing her job. I actually commend her for not wavering under my beast mode. I will be more mindful next time. Sa susunod ibababad ko nalang yung longganisa beforehand para di ko na dalhin yung bote. Or gagawin ko nalang popsicle yung suka tapos tutunawin ko sa bahay.